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I’ve been a Yoda fan for years and have just heard that the master scratcher is playing this April and May around the UK. He’s friendly and fun in the same way as Mr Scruff. You can dance to his beats, but you can grin while you do it because his mixes are just so happy and funny.

I have a few hallowed tunes that are my favourite of all time (including Mr Scruff “Get a Move On” and “DotA” by Basshunter) and this George Formby mix is one of them.

I actually got my hands on a ukelele and original George Formby music from the 1930’s/1940’s after a great-uncle passed away and left it to the family. The songs are actually quite risque for the era in which they were written. George Formby was once the top-billing artist of the UK.

Get DJ Yoda tickets here.

The lyrics to the original song:

If you want to know the time ask a policeman
The proper rhythmic time, ask a policeman
Every copper on the beat, yeh he’s got rhythm in his feet
One step, two. step, three step, four step, rag time, jazz time swing,

We’re always on the beat, the lads in blue are always on the beat.
We raise our batons and we raise our voices in song
To keep us cheery when we’re swinging along,
We’re always smart and neat, to see us passing gives the girls a treat
They all start waving and we wink a friendly eye,

Hear them whisper “Ain’t she sweet” we can sweep them off their feet

Because we’re on the beat
Why do all the nursemaids say “Oh I think you police are marvelous”
Who’s with cook on her half-day “My rhapsody in blue”

Why do all the convicts shout “I think you police are marvellous”.
What is all this fuss about, well I’m not asking you
For the reason is plain let me tell you again.

We’re always on the beat, you’ll see us standing guard on every street
If things upset you there’s no need to worry or frown
Ask a policeman and he won’t let you down
For anyone you meet, is bound to tell you that we’re hard to beat
We know the answers and we tell you one and all
If you’re wandering up and down, we’ll show you how to go to town
Because we’re on the beat.

We’re always on the beat, we’re not allowed to stop and take a seat.
We keep on walking through the winter, summer and spring
Rain or sunshine well it don’t mean a thing
We’re always on our feet, we suffer agonies from cold and heat
But we don’t grumble for our duty must be done
Though we may be full of aches we never have to ask for breaks
Because we’re on the beat.